Date from Hell: Dating Narcissists and Psychopaths

Many super soldiers I have met are malignant narcissists. 

Many think they are "special". 

They have a track record of ruining lives, including their own. 

To anyone intrigued by anyone who has stepped forward and calls themselves a "super soldier", think twice and take steps to get out and get away from these people immediately. For the record, I DO NOT call myself a "super soldier". It's a horrible, triggering term for me, and I certainly would not take pride in the term and have corrected people a lot on this- if you must label me, call me a human test subject and/or a MILAB, for that is most certainly what I am.

But there is zero glory or joy to be had in any of this. You are a guinea pig owned by the state if you ever have the misfortune of having men in black tactical gear pointing guns at your head screaming at you to "shut the fuck up" if you "say one more word or I'll blow your fucking head off" and then they inject you with Rohypnol, throw you in a body bag and take you to an underground facility for experimentation, interrogation, torture and mind control/drugging/trauma.

The media are the ones who have erroneously called me a Super Soldier, and I loathe the term. I am not nor do I associate myself as one. That's my final answer. 

Anyone who thinks what's been done to them in the programs is a good thing and "the next stage of humanity" in a *good* way (i.e., technology, trauma and mind control are being used to remove the emotions of empathy, regret, remorse, guilt, compassion, understanding and feeling the pain of another, etc.), you're sick in the head and there's something wrong with you. 

Having lived with an incurable narcissist for six regrettable weeks of my life, I can tell you that it has literally taken years to get over the destruction it caused. He displayed all of the characteristics of a malignant narcissist times ten in addition to having a host of other connected disorders and addictions and was emotionally, verbally and physically abusive. 

This is what's been done to them- whomever created them literally created monsters. Not making excuses for their behavior, but in my direct, personal experience, I know that something of an organized nature that involved intel agencies made these people the way they were.

This is the thing that never gets discussed in the UFO Conferences and the Kerry Cassidy videos because no one wants to talk about this element- but it is very real. I have witnessed and personally experienced the abuse these people wield, they have ruined lives, families, their own lives- all for the pursuit of attention--  and they feed on empaths for dinner. 

You can't have compassion for a scorpion. They will only sting you if they tell you they will take you across the river on their back. It is their nature. 

The more anyone who has been affected by a narcissist - which is basically everyone at this point- can learn about this tragic condition, the better. And yes, it is something akin to saying as Sam says, they are aliens from outer space. They have no emotions other than self-pity and self-glorification. There is no "You" when you date one. It is all about them. You will be taking care of them, housing them, paying for everything for them, supporting their every move, and all the time they will be feeding on you like the vampire they are. 

Don't give them their narcissistic supply. Don't get duped. They move in fast and take no prisoners. They are relentless. It's best to learn about them and know what they want from the get go- and what they want is complete and utter annihilation. They are miserable souls, if they even had one. 

Most of them don't. 

So for those men and women who were giving certain super soldiers I know marriage proposals and saying you wanted to have their babies and are getting dewy-eyed and basking in the glow of their no doubt sometimes highly exaggerated and/or flat out lies of tales of "battle" and you telling me to my face that what's happened to me by these people and what I have been forced to do under the control of my more covert captors is "romantic" : There's something seriously wrong with you, you are probably co-dependent or a covert narcissist/have a rampant personality disorder yourself, and you are absolutely falling for a predator. 

These are not people to be glorified. Certainly these are people not to be trusted!

 As a MILAB I have been threatened by the best of them and every trick and tactic in the book as been thrown my way in attempts to simply find out what's happened to me. God knows no therapist could help me in that regard. Oh sure, they might have been able to figure out their personalities, but then you start going down the rabbit hole as to WHY they became the way they did, as well as the paranormal and organized occult/ritual aspect of this and then the therapist literally freezes, becomes scared and they say they have no framework for which you are describing, that it's a "spiritual" concern and is outside of the confines of the therapeutic model/the DSM and then they cut off all contact with you. They slam the door on you and tell you you're on your own when you bring up the woo-woo parts of this. Most will say all that part is in your head/you're making it up/that can't happen and that is that. For having the audacity to simply find out what's happened to me, I in turn have been re-traumatized by these same "helpers" who just want to "heal" me and they have questioned why I would even want to hang out with such people in the first place, that there must be something wrong with me! Again, this was not a pleasure cruise I was after. I wanted to find out information pertinent to my situation, what happened to me after I had guns pointed at my head and something injected into my arm. But that part doesn't seem to get through to the "professional class". They tend to call me "psychologically damaged" or "exhibit symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder" myself without even knowing my situation. 

(For the record, I don't have it, I have been diagnosed with PTSD twice however. Gee, wonder where that came from. Could some of it be from, oh I dunno, having guns pointed at my head and being drugged and taken from my home to be used in nefarious covert studies as a human test subject? Mayhaps?)

But even torture specialists don't know what to do with me with the "outrageous" claims I am making about the paranormal/exotic technology/mind control that just happen to be not only true, but so true that it is so far beyond the scope of most people's capabilities to deal with the reality I deal with on a daily basis that often I have been told they needed a sedative, or a bottle of wine, or an entire dime bag just to get to sleep that night after hearing it. I am not doing this for mine or anyone else's pleasure. I am just trying to get to the bottom of this. And for those of you who abandoned me mid-stream on this,  or wanted to yet again re-traumatize me and exploit me to be used as a "case subject" in one of your fucking books, fuck you again- and the horse you rode in on too. 

It is a dark, sick rabbit hole you go down when you choose to associate yourself with these people. I regret it to this day, but again, I tried to find out what was happening to me. Unfortunately some of what they were saying that happened to me it turns out was true. For the record yet again, I don't consider these people "friends" or even associates- I "associated" myself just long enough so I could understand how this operates and how to learn about how the people who've done this to me think/work. I have learned much about how they operate, and as a result, I am strengthened and have vowed to never let them in again. But we were never "friends". Not ever. So anything you read about how I "co-assisted" in the abuse of this or that person by virtue of my "association" with certain people is patently untrue and is part of yet another smear campaign designed to discredit me. And yet I haven't been sued yet. And I won't be, because I am not a liar.

I am not making this up. I am not fabricating the nature of my experiences/reality. I am not delusional. I am not "self-harming" as some trolls erroneously think I am when these marks appear on my body. I have done none of this nor have I behaved in the way these liars and discredit ors and detractors and trolls are saying I am. 

I am simply trying to find out what's happened and continues to happen to me.

The narcissists as well as the leagues of weak-willed and feeble lackeys and fanboys and girls and codependents and spineless toadies who fall sway to their initial appeal and who continue to slavishly follow them around and glorify them and sympathize with their plight long after the mask came off are also to be avoided. There's no helping someone who doesn't want to be helped, and further more, they would have no personality if they couldn't reflect themselves in the one-way mirror that is the mind of a Super Soldier narcissist anyway. 

Many personality disorders are on display in this "community"- again, if you want to be in this "club", you are not a well person.  

Dissociative Identity Disorder with these people often goes hand in hand with heavy multiple addictions, PTSD,  Narcissism and Borderline Personality Disorder. I am not the one diagnosing them, they have either told me or have been diagnosed with this and/or have stated this publicly themselves. 

The most egregious ones I have met have all of the above stated conditions.

These are nasty, nasty, backstabbing, incredibly cruel and unusual people and they are not your friends. They are to be avoided like the plague. There are entire wards at hospitals that should be sectioned off for these people and they should be kept from humanity the rest of their lives. 

But instead they are glorified and asked to speak at the Super Soldier Summit and Kerry Cassidy and others accept their complete inability to distinguish fantasy from reality, and she supports the very people who have been harassing me and calls me the one who is "troubled" and perpetuates their myth that they are a "super race". But whatever. She's working for the people who did this to them anyway. 

Look: They are malignant. They are diseased. They are nothing to write home about. 

And yet it is quite the insight into what the NWO creates when they do create a "super" (ugh) soldier.

It is about the farthest thing from "romantic" that can happen when a narcissist comes into your life. It has been one of the most traumatic things I have ever experienced to live with and make the decision to have contact with malignant narcissists. I do not recommend it. 

The only suggestion I have for you is complete non-contact. 

"The Kid With the Replaceable Head" by Richard Hell & The Voidoids

So this is weird. As soon as I just updated the latest IBIS post with the Kerry Cassidy (and MI5) reference (http://anyaisachannel.blogspot.com/2013/06/update-to-my-original-post-about.html), my computer screen opened a new window by itself and I found myself looking at a Youtube channel for Richard Hell, the musician and poet/writer.
This video was the first one you see on the video list. 

I thought this immediately funny, strange, and not a coincidence since Casbolt is always going on and on about his detatchable, replaceable cyborg head. Call me crazy, but I had a feeling it was one of his people responsible for that lil' computer glitch. 

It seems the MINUTE I even so much as utter the word "MI5" or "Kerry Cassidy" lately, all kinds of strange things start happening. Hmmmmmmmm! I hope you are enjoying this, boys. I certainly am. If they are  threats, they don't, won't and can't stop me, and if you are goading me on to find more and talk about more, it's unnecessary but really funny. 

Update to my original post about Project IBIS

This update was also added to the original March, 2011 post. Thanks for reading. 


UPDATE: June 15th, 2013

I want to make a slight retraction here. Apparently there have been more visits on this blog post so far than any other post in my blog's history and it is because of the Erin Green Hicks interview with Project Camelot.

My personal feelings are that this woman is a very mentally troubled -- delusional, even --  individual, and that Kerry Cassidy has displayed an incredibly irresponsible, egregious lack of journalistic integrity by allowing this interview to occur without doing due diligence or in using any of her world-famous "discernment" and "intuition" that she claims is so strong.

 I was told by a source that Hicks claims that she was a Rothschild were also false- the name was purchased. Not to mention several wild inconsistencies in her statements in the interview just don't add up - among others, she was given money from the sale of what she said was Jesse James's .357 Magnum, but while the .357 Magnum was first made in 1934, Jesse James died in 1882.

Also, Hicks posted on Facebook in a comment directed at me that she was in basically all the mind control programs ever made, including IBIS, and when I challenged her on this statement, she laid into me about a purely fictitious conversation with someone she refused to name who supposedly told her that I told them how I "rip people off" by "making them think I am psychic".

Uh, no. This conversation never happened. And if I ever said something like that, say, to someone equally delusional like Sarah Stanga when we were still on speaking terms, it would have always and ever been A JOKE. A sarcastic joke. Of course the first thing to go out the window with mental illness is a sense of humor, so I am not surprised if I had said something like that in jest, a not well at all person would have construed that as fact, when it was not.

It's funny that Cassidy, who was born in a military hospital, grew up in the CIA and mind control incubator/hotbed of Palo Alto, California (same area near Berkeley that Alejandro, my "favorite" paid informant/his intelligence agent dad is from/lives and where many agents retire and congregate).

It's also funny to think that Cassidy, who is one of the researchers who attended the infamous Bilderberg-style secret UFO researcher mind-controlled conference in Bucks County, Pa., last fall (http://anyaisachannel.blogspot.com/2013/05/you-got-some-splainin-to-do.html) and has allegedly been involved with a high-ranking MI5 official who has been feeding her disinfo for years, "chose" someone like Hicks to interview.

My "discernment" and "intuition" tells me that Green is in fact a plant who IS in one mind control program- but it's not IBIS. It's one whose name escapes me at the moment, but a very real one that is run by the CIA and uses high functioning paranoid schizophrenics to muddy the waters in COINTELPRO type situations like this. In other words, Erin Green Hicks is probably (allegedly) an unwitting CIA asset.

The feds made Erin think she was all of this and more (if she's a psychic super soldier and a Rothschild, I'm a Mr. Softy ice cream truck) and then unleashed her on the public by "creating an opportunity" at the equally suspect and to be avoided at all costs CIA-infused Super Soldier Summit in California last May.

Regardless, I feel it necessary to clarify on my original points pertaining to what no doubt has been someone messing with my head about the origins of this project, which may or may not exist under the label of "IBIS".

When I first found out about the fact that I was a military abductee by Aaron McCollum in April, 2010, my head was spinning for months. This was without a doubt, one of the most traumatic times in my entire life and I was searching for answers and incredibly vulnerable. When James Casbolt came into my life not long after and told me that he remembered me from mind control programs, to say it was shocking was an understatement. But deep down, I think my reaction was so strong because I actually knew that there was a basis for his statements. I experienced the familiar feeling of having a high level of recognizing him without knowing why, a high volume of psychic activity coming from him, a number of weird synchronicities and odd timings in communication with him, and of course the obvious indicator of my experience as a MILAB, recovered memories of him.

Say what you will about Casbolt, but his interactions with me are indicative of the "real deals" from mind control programs whom I have met, and that is a- very- small number of people.  No more than one or two handfuls of people in the whole world have I met who have this profoundly disturbing effect on me. And fancy that, we all seem to remember each other.

If I remember someone, I remember them. Period. End of story. I don't know how, but it always follows the same dreadful pattern of a flood of bizarre, no context whatsoever but linearly progressed memories unfolding suddenly and horribly like they are on a movie screen, the familiar shock, the feeling of falling down a hole, the horrible dread, the numbness, the sweat that breaks out, the nausea-- all the familiar symptoms of being triggered.

With Hicks, I have experienced none of this. Nada. Zilch.

Do I think people like Casbolt are master manipulators who make no secret of their ability to remote influence people and utilize hypnosis on them through methods like neurolinguistic programming? Absolutely. Do I think there's a possibility I could have been worked over hard mentally by this man? Yes.

But I still cannot escape the fact that Casbolt still might legitimately have been, in if not in IBIS, some kind of similarly eugenics-based psychic/genetic manipulation/human test subject/mind control programs with me.

There are literally too many "coincidences" and telepathic/psychic experiences, and corroborations I've had pertaining to him independent of any kind of remote control "massaging" and "priming of the pump" from him that for him to be this much of a master at organization and control over me seems suspect.

I can personally tell you from direct conversations by phone and years of emails with this man that he has serious trouble distinguishing reality from fantasy as he is definitely plagued with some kind of dissociative disorder (there are hundreds, not just DID) that he still struggles with every day-- even though he is also incredibly psychic, and something definitely has happened to him in mind control programs. Of that I have no doubt.

Do I think that my associations with Casbolt are the sum total of what has happened to me, however? No. Because these triggers have been happening to me with other people, like Aaron McCollum, who has basically admitted to abducting me in a MILAB, and this was months before I had even met or communicated with Casbolt.

I was introduced to another woman who was apparently also abducted by Aaron, and I had the exact same triggered reaction to her that I did to McCollum and Casbolt, and again, this was well before I had even communicated with James. (This woman wishes to remain anonymous, but we both remember each other from the programs and have spooky similarities in how we react to these things, are both incredibly psychic, etc etc.  I also know from recovered memories with her in them that she was a courier like I was and used in what either was something to make us think we were time traveling or we actually were time traveling back to places like Russia and the Truman Administration Oval Office, both in the late 40s/1947.  I have talked about this in several interviews, sorry, can't remember the exact ones right now, but you'll find them if you go to my "Links I like" column of this blog and just click on the ones you'd like to hear, you'll hear me talk about it eventually.)

With that said, please read this original post. Thank you for your patience. It's much less traumatic to have to deal with this horrific- whatever it is that's been done to me- since I originally posted this in March, 2011.  But it's still hard, it's still baffling, and it's still very much a confusing, traumatic reality for me to deal with, one that I hope I can get some light shed on and some answers from before I die.
I want to know what this is that's being done to me. I don't care if it's all just been a big practical joke at my expense and I've just been Punked all along. I just want to know what's really happened.

And I want to prosecute the people who did this. Even if it's just a truth and reconciliation situation. I want the world to know that something horrible has happened to all of us in this and to not let it happen again.

I don't know for sure anymore if I am one of those 42 children, or even if there were 42 children to begin with. Casbolt HAS been a disinformation agent. But not your typical one. There is something going on with him legit, but it takes so long to find the (truly bizarre) kernel of truth in what he says at the heart of it that he makes it almost not worth your while to pursue it. Which I think is kind of the point.

Here's what I think is true that Casbolt is currently spending obscene amounts of time attempting to cover up with lies and racist rhetoric designed to divide and conquer: that he and I were both involved with time travel experiments.

Yep, I said it. Of that I am increasingly thinking this is why so much time and energy has been spent discrediting himself as well as others by being as literally repellent as he possibly can be. Once you talk about something as out there as time travel, the logic seems to be that you almost have to pad it with a bunch of crap so labyrinthian that no one takes you seriously just as a self-protective measure to keep you from getting offed by the Powers That Be.

But time and again, I keep remembering, having, and experiencing memories and/or direct experiences of cybernetics, incredible psychic skills, superhuman abilities, knowledge of things we don't do in waking life like driving submarines and speaking different languages fluently and participating in incredible feats of intelligence, strength, speed and agility, both physical and mental, experiencing, participating in and witnessing horrific abuse of all kinds, and then of course the most forbidden/provocative topic of all, being an active participant in time travel.

From all of us whom I am involved with in these programs I get recovered memories of these kinds. Over and over again. And only with certain people. A small, horribly consistent group of people. Most of whom have horrific tales of abuse and subsequent dissociative identity disorder and/or post traumatic stress disorder in their backgrounds and in their day to day lives.

I hope this gives you some context for what I am talking about. I hope this solves something and gives some kind of resolution that you might require. I hope it helps and does no harm.

Anyway, here is the original post from March 6th, 2011:

For those of you who don't know what IBIS is, it is a life extension program that was used on 42 children around the world. Age regression was a recurring theme.

Here is a link for more info on that:

http://projectcamelotproductions.com/interviews/james_casbolt/james_casbolt.html

and on a blog here:

http://wemustknow.net/2010/10/the-life-and-times-of-michael-prince/


"The name of the project was IBIS.
42 children tracked in various contries.
Blood PRIME was being tracked by the NSA and MI6- Annunaki DNA.
Project started in 1972, initiated from Tavistock institute by Dr Green and others"

FYI, "Dr. Green" is supposedly Josef Mengele.

When I found out, I didn't want to believe it. God knows I don't want to be a part of this. But James Casbolt has sent me information corroborated from a third party in covert programs with James who shall remain nameless who remembers me from an underground base in Canada in 1975. We were taken there and experimented on for weeks at a time when we were around 4 years old. This person doesn't know me consciously and yet without any information from James, he was able to give him my full name. I am also pretty sure he also remembers me as an adult in other contexts as well, I shudder to think which ones. He hasn't said yet and I am not sure I want to know at this point.

Supposedly this person was also one of the super soldiers whose memories were warehoused inside of me for safe keeping when I was taken on board a TR3 by James in 1999.

I did a Skype session recently with this person and was absolutely unsettled by the conversation. I instantly recognized this person and yet had never met him in this conscious reality before the meeting.

It was only after the conversation that I was flooded with deeply unsettling recollections of experiments done on me that James Casbolt was forced to participate in. I have memories of the third party as well, but they are more limited in scope. This person told me he usually gets recovered memories after speaking with others in the programs, which has been a typical response for me as well.

For some reason, James wasn't even supposed to be born in 1975, but I have memories of him being involved as well as a child about the same age as me. Bear in mind, this was/is an age regression program that could age you and regress you for whatever purposes those in the programs want(ed), so it very well could have been him at age 4, 5, or 6, even though this took place a good year before he was even supposed to be born.

For some reason, I know that it is James who is with me in these memories even though I am six years older than him. (I could be wrong, of course. But the memory is that I have known this person for a long time and I "recognized" James as a child from his energy if that makes any sense. I could be blending memories with others as well, it could be James' contact who I spoke with the other day, it may be another little boy, but for some reason I want to say this is James. It's very confusing. Please bear with me.)

I may publish my recovered memories of these experiences when I am ready, but they are deeply disturbing for me and it's hard.